Tuesday, November 24, 2009

so many things...

Suddenly this week is filled with so many things. Suddenly, situations are dire. And rushed. We are moving our business...our shop...across the parking lot from our current shop...and we need to be done by the first of December. We are currently in a 4500 sq. ft. shop. We are moving into a 1400 sq. ft. shop. Downsizing. The economy. Need I say more?
In the meantime...things are unsettling. Business somehow has to carry on...you know, needing an income and all. So our employee is continuing to work at the old shop as Chris and the boys (and me, today and tomorrow) are running back and forth across the parking lot...or driving back and forth on the forklift...shifting our lives. And our livelihood. Kind of scary. And hectic. And if I wasn't already saturated in the anxiety department...this would surely fill me right up.
Overwhelming. To say the least. And thinking of it all makes me sick to my stomach.
And all of this in the midst of a time that I'm supposed to be being thankful. All of this during the Thanksgiving week.
I'm torn. I'm focused on my SELF and my situation. I'm seeing things through a hazy filter of fear...and frustration. My glass is definitely half-empty.
Then I am reminded of God's word...bits of scripture that pop into my head at just the right time. Be anxious for nothing...in all things give thanks to God...present your requests to Him and He will give you the desires of your heart.
I don't know all of the addresses of these scriptures in the bible. I couldn't tell you where to turn to find them. I'd have to look in my concordance, just like you. The incredible part is that at this point...in this moment, as I am fearful and frustrated and tired, I don't have to know where they are. GOD knows where they are...and as I rattle them off in my heart, He knows what I am talking about. He knows my heart-cry. He knows that I am pulling up little bits and pieces of scripture that I've read along the way...little nuggets of truth and hope. Some of them I've read only once. Some of them...every three months. The amazing part is that I can rattle them off because they are stored in my heart. God's Word, there for me when I need encouragement. When I need hope. When I need HIM. Tucked away...safe and sound...for me. For such a time as this.
The words continue to come...don't worry about tomorrow...today has enough troubles of its own. I will never leave you nor forsake you. You are crushed...perplexed...persecuted...but NOT abandoned.
He shows up at just the right time. We may think He's late. Because we're impatient. But he's not. He's never late. God is always right on time. His time. And His ways are perfect.
So many things...crushing me on every side. Closing in on me. Making it hard to breathe. Then I hear...He brought me out into a spacious place; he rescued me because he delighted in me. I know that address...Psalm 18. One of my favorite scriptures. In my bible I have it highlighted and dated and noted and scribbled and sticky noted and dog-eared. And next to this scripture, verse 19, where it says He brought me out into a spacious place, I wrote, "So I could breathe."
What would I do without God? I don't even want to imagine. He IS the way and the truth and the life. He IS the Alpha and Omega. He IS everything...the Creator of all things. And yet...in all of that, He's still that still, small voice inside my heart. Who am I that you are mindful of me? There are no words...
Life is crazy. Yes. It is. But God is good. All the time. And when I get over myself I realize that I have so much to be thankful for. SO much. My kids...my husband...family...my cozy home...central heat...coffee...health....kindred spirits...a car that runs...reading glasses...food in the cupboard...clean water...hot water...friends...sisters in Christ...the list goes on...and on.
In the midst of the storm...I am thankful. God is for me...and His love endures forever. And I am grateful...

8 comments:

Elaine said...

Stand firm, my friend. I'm grateful for you today.

dmoms said...

yep, I second Elaine. You can do this. Be strong and courageous.

Camie | Red Gate Gardens said...

Amen, amen, amen.

You also have friends that are praying in earnest...

"Be still and know that He is God. Be still and know that He is able. Come rest your head upon His breast..."

Amy Blogs @ River Rock Cottage said...

So many thoughts running in my head as I read your post. You have beautifully expressed so many truths that we must cling to. I feel for you more than you know. My husband and I built our dream home and have continued to work on it for six years. My husband has poured so much of himself into this place! We thought this would be our last home - a permanent place. Tomorrow, a real estate agent is coming to tell us what we need to do to sell it. So we can downsize. It's that or I go back to work with little ones still at home. Choices. What is right for me is not necessarily right for someone else, but we adopted these children so we could parent them. I am making my choice. The house is just an earthly dwelling. We're putting it up for sale and letting God decide what is best. Now I have to walk in faith and trust Him. Thanks again for sharing your heart and so many good scriptures!

Michelle said...

:::hug:::
Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God.
Philippians 4:6

http://bible.cc/philippians/4-6.htm

I use bible.cc to find passages when I can't remember enough to find them in a Bible. The site offers several translations so it's helpful when you can't remember the phrase exactly.

It's good that you and Chris are being proactive to keep the business going. I'll keep you and your family in my prayers.

Beegirl said...

Oh love.. Keeping you close in my thoughts and prayers...

Conny said...

This too shall pass (as I've thought to myself many times). I hope the move goes well. I'm with Beegirl - keeping you in thoughts and prayers.

Nancy said...

Oh girl. I've been away for a week so I'm trying to get caught up here. Sounds like a difficult week. I do hope that the pressures have lessened, meaning that the move is done. Be strong. Like BeeGirl, I'll be keeping you close.