The Rebel.

very old photo...

I think I forgot how to work my camera. My real camera. Ever since I got my iPhone two Christmases ago I haven't picked up my poor, neglected Canon but maybe three times. And each time it felt foreign to me. So I put it away. And there it's sat. 

Instead I've been documenting moments with my phone and on Instagram. I like Instagram. And taking photos with my phone. It's quick. It's easy. I don't have to plug it in and load it up and file it and edit it and resize it and label it and worry how much space it's taking up on the hard drive.

But...I miss my camera.

My cousin sent an email a week or so ago asking me to be a photographer at a fund-raising event in a few weeks. And my first thought was, "I'm better with inanimate objects."  And my second thought was,  "Do I even know how to use my camera anymore?"  It really got me thinking. (Thanks for the nudge, Megan! If I can get familiar with my camera again I will say "yes".)

I have been intrigued by photography since I was a teen. When I was in high school I was on the Yearbook committee and was envious of the photographers...big cameras hanging around their necks, hall passes to walk around school taking candids, access to the dark room, developing photos and going over proofs.

Yes, I was definitely intrigued.

Fast forward to about 12 years ago. I was at a friend's house, a young gal I'd met at church, and she was cleaning out a trailer her brother had been staying in. He had an addiction and up and disappeared one day, leaving some of his personal belongings behind. One of those belongings was a Canon 35 mm camera. She picked it up and handed it to me, "Do you want this?" (How'd she know I'd always wanted a 35 mm camera?)

"Oh no. I can't take that. It's too much." I replied.

"I'm just going to donate it if you don't. Are you sure?"

"Wow. Well, yeah. I'd love it! Are you sure?"

She was sure. And all of a sudden I had a 35 mm camera...gifted to me.

It was in great condition. It was a film camera. And it was awesome. But it was also a bit of an expensive hobby. So, I used it, but wasn't really able to learn how properly. With a film camera you never know how the photo is going to come out until you develop it. And by the time I developed the photos I had no idea what settings I'd used, and I wasn't disciplined enough to keep notes. So I dabbled, took some nice photos (purely by luck), and had fun with it now and then.

Right around the time I was gifted my film camera, the digital cameras were becoming popular. But they were pricey. But a year or two later, to my surprise, my husband told me he wanted to get me a digital camera for my birthday. He really encouraged my love of photography...as gifts at Christmas and my birthday he'd purchased some nice lenses and a good camera bag. So when we began shopping for a digital we decided to purchase one that would fit the lenses he'd already purchased for me. That's how I ended up with my Canon Rebel.

It turned out to be one of the best gifts ever. I love my Rebel...even though I've neglected it for too long. How great is a digital camera? I can take hundreds of photos, check and double check, delete what I don't like and keep what I do. No waiting on film to be developed. No running out of film. It's so great!

I really had no idea what I was doing with my camera for a long time. (Not that I really do now, but I definitely understand more than I did.) I fumbled with switches and moved dials around, but never really got any of it.

I think when I really got serious about taking photos, when the switch flipped if you will, was when I decided to take some photos of a bunch of Calla Lily's a friend had given me from her garden. I placed them in a vase, set them on the floor by the back door window (which still, to this day, provides my favorite light for photography) and snapped away. By the end of the photo session the flower that at one time made me think of funerals and death became one of my favorite flowers. Calla Lily's are very photogenic, it turns out.

That was about 5 or 6 years ago. And now, here I am, unsure of how to work my beloved Rebel. It's not the fanciest. It's not the biggest and baddest. But it's perfect for me. It's enough for me. It's plenty for me. And today I am vowing to get it out and use it. (I've already got it out of it's bag in the middle of writing this post...it's sitting here next to me...looking slightly forlorn, but hopeful. Or maybe that's me?)

Do you know that my photos were very instrumental in the making of this blog? Photos are such an important part of Give a Girl a Fig that if I don't have a photo to share, I don't write a post. So you know when things are quiet around here I haven't been taking photos either. The creativity of writing seems to go hand in hand with taking pictures. (Hmm...that's something to ponder...)

So...what now?

Well. I already got my camera out. It's sitting here at the ready. Now I need to take some time to reacquaint myself with it. Maybe it'll be like riding a bike...I hope.

Honestly, the thought of using my camera again is a bit daunting. I feel like I need to take some time (what is that?) to clean up my photo files. And probably get them off this computer and onto my external hard-drive (another gift from my hubby to encourage my picture-taking...he's always been a great encourager to me, in creativity and in life in general). I need to figure out a good way to file and store photos, as well as have them accessible to share easily on the blog.

Daunting...yes. But it's all doable. I just need to take one step at a time.

A day with my mom...

A couple of weekends ago I went to Sonoma with my mom. We went to an art festival...ate some lunch...went to some shops...and then it began to rain!

We decided to duck into a little coffee shop. A very crowded little coffee shop. We ordered a latte, an earl grey and a slice of torte each...apricot for me, berry for mom. Somehow we lucked out and got a cozy little table by the window.

We talked and ate and took photos and watched the rain come down. It was a really good day...

sunshine...on a cloudy day.

flickr favorites...I can't get enough. go here for credits.

It's cold and gray and dreary here today...threatening rain...maybe snow some say. That would be fine by me. 

I am not sure how I'm feeling today...not as good as yesterday...but better than last Friday...slightly more wheezy...and a little more coughing...again. Woke up twice last night, coughing...which I haven't done in a few nights. I'm attributing it to the steroids...they helped, but now I'm done taking them...but do I need more? Waiting on a call from the Dr. to see what she wants me to do. I wish she'd hurry up...the waiting is making me a bit anxious.

I am tired of this...

Browsing beautiful photography on flickr.com is a nice way to pass the time when you're under the weather...

{I think I am in need of some Vitamin C...what do you think?}

(Maybe when I go to Costco for my inhaler I'll buy a big box of oranges like the one my beautiful friend Mandy brought to me when I was first sick...oh, were they good. Thank you, Mandy! Do you know that she and I have known each other since were 13...that is 30 years! How can that be? And now...our sons hang out together now and then. Crazy.)

Speaking of my son, Seth is home sick today...and yesterday, too. Sore throat, stuffy nose, aches...yesterday a fever, but not today. We are a pair...

Other than that...not a lot going on around here...still. Ready to be well...prayers would be most welcome...for healing, clear airways, wisdom for the Dr. to treat this once and for all...patience and calm for ME. Thank you...xo

I went for a drive on Sunday afternoon...

 It was cold and rainy on Sunday...but I was really wanting to take my camera out and snap some photos. It'd been too long...my camera bag was dusty...I couldn't find my cable to upload photos...all signs that it had been far too long since I'd taken pictures just for the heck of it.

I loaded up my camera bag...grabbed my Starbuck's gift card...and hit the road. That's me over there to the right...at the Starbuck's drive-thru. Can you see me? Waiting ever so patiently for that non-fat latte? Oh yeah...and extra hot. It was delicious...the perfect accompaniment to my rainy day drive in the country. An Artist's Date if you will...

Coffee in hand, wipers going and radio on, I headed down the road. I drove out to a popular hiking spot just outside of town...but the inspiration just wasn't there. I wandered around and took a few shots...but ended up back in the car in search of something...else.

I decided to drive to one of my favorite country roads in my area. It's only a couple miles outside of town but it seems much further away. It's a bit steep...and quite narrow in several spots. And maybe a teensy bit dangerous to drive alone...on a rainy and slippery day. (Or any day, really) But...I have 4WD...and I called Chris to let him know where he could find me should I not be home in a reasonable amount of time. Just in case...

The views are incredible. Sitting here in my tiny little corner of the world I forget sometimes that there's a great big beautiful world around me. 

I'm a sucker for tree tunnels.

I was gone for a little over an hour. And took almost a hundred photos. Gotta love digital, eh?  I kept a few...and deleted quite a few more. And decided I needed to work on my exposure.

I also decided that an Artist's Date is in order a little more often...

Art is a collaboration between God and the artist,

and the less the artist does the better. ~André Gide

8:25.

 I love autumn. And I love "fall"ing back. Springing forward? It makes me mad. And I don't seem to ever get used to it. Ever. But falling back makes me feel good...and cozy...and safe. I like that it gets dark early...it reminds me to cook dinner. When it's light for so long I don't think to cook. Not to mention, it's stinkin' hot...and who wants to cook when it's so stifling hot?

Yeah...fall...I'm loving this.

I took this photo in Belgium. It's a random little vignette to the right of the sink in the kitchenette. It says it's 8:25am (I know it's am because that's the only time we went into the kitchen, in the mornings)...I wonder where we were headed the day I took this shot? I can't remember. And my camera battery died at one point early on in the trip and since we were sharing chargers and adapters and the power there was all weird, I wasn't able to recharge it right away. Then, I forgot to charge it...and before I knew it I'd missed some great photo opportunities. I didn't take nearly as many pictures as I thought I would. I think it's just because we were really busy...and in the car traveling from location to location much of the time that I got tired of blurred drive-by shots. (Word has it I'm going to be getting a CD of all the pictures everyone else took, too. I hope so!)

I was talking to my friend's Jess and Irvina yesterday (they were the ministry leaders I traveled with) and we realized that we didn't really take pictures during ministry events. We took lots while we were sightseeing...and while we were hanging around the hostel or walking through the town. But we didn't take many of the churches we visited or the events we attended. I mean, taking pictures at events like that isn't always appropriate...and you do have to be discreet. A few of us did take a few pictures. But it's almost like once we got ready and got in the vans and were headed to an event we were focused on what was ahead of us...even though we never knew what to expect. Plus, we were all so busy praying for people, or singing or speaking...we were too busy to think to take photos! On several occasions we had no idea what we were going to experience. We really went blindly into many of our visits. It was so great! And required TRUST. Major amounts of trust, I tell you. It was incredible...a totally incredible experience.

making a short story long.

OK...so you may have noticed that I haven't been posting photos on my blog for a while. Some people have asked...and wondered...and inquired...saying they miss my photos. I miss them, too, I have to admit. I love taking pictures. I love my camera. I love sharing with you what I see through the lens. But...I ran into a problem a while back.

my beloved...

You may remember that I had computer trouble a few months ago...the computer died.And when the computer went, it took my photos WITH it. I have some saved to Flickr and Shutterfly...but not ALL of them. And...since I didn't listen to my husband when he said (multiple times, I will add), "Stop putting all these pictures on the computer...load them onto your external hard-drive that you HAD TO HAVE...and that way, if anything happens to the computer, you've still got your stuff."

Dangit.

Can you guess who didn't listen to her husband?

So the computer died and we rushed out and got a new one because I was in the midst of taking three online college courses. (I'm sure you remember this...I cried about it every other second.) Anyway...we got a new computer that we really couldn't afford. But with school, I couldn't afford NOT to...you know? So we got the computer...but couldn't afford to pay to have my photos retrieved at that time. So there they sit...on the dead computer...waiting patiently to be rescued!

As far as this computer...and taking photos...and storing and loading and editing...I don't have any software on this new computer yet to do the uploading and editing. And I have been too lazy to DO anything about that. Or maybe too busy. Or lazy. Or don't want to figure out loading it and setting it up and choosing defaults...blah blah blah. I have a love/hate relationship with computers.

So...the computer dies...no editing software...no time...no inspiration...and this equals no photos. But it's only temporary...

In the meantime, I'm getting ready for my trip to Belgium. I think I've mentioned that a time or two, oui? (Practicing my French for the trip...je ne parlez francais, un petit peu...je mal a la tete...ou...ferme ta bouche!...a sampling of what I DO know...courtesy of 9th grade. Bad.)

Anyway...so I'm going to Belgium. And you can't go to Belgium and NOT take photos. Right? That would be insane. Especially for someone like me who LOVES to take photos. It would be a lifelong regret...I know it. So all this time I'm knowing that I have to take my camera...and I have to take pictures...but I'm worried, because my camera is heavy...and bulky...and awesome and wonderful...but not conducive to travel. But, still, I'm planning on taking it...and I'm planning on taking photos..many photos...copious amounts of photos...it's what I do. (When I'm not paralyzed by the thought of loading software to my computer, anyway)

Wow...I am really making a very simple story extremely complicated. It's also what I do. Stay with me...I'm going somewhere with this. Really! I am!

Many years ago my husband bought a guitar amp. A large, bulky, old, crusty, wonderful (in his eyes) guitar amp. When I met him, I met the guitar amp. It was a package deal. Well...a few months back he decided it was time to let the amp go. It was time to sell it. Trade it in for a newer model. (Hmmm...I better be careful! If a man can trade in his beloved amp for a newer model..who's to say...um...nah...!!) In all seriousness, he's been getting a bit more serious with his music and felt he needed something easier to transport.

So he put the amp on eBay...and eventually, it sold. And because it was so old and crusty...it was actually awesome and vintage. Handmade. With a signature. From England. Super cool. Even I was intrigued.

In no time at all...the amp sold. He was blessed to make a bit of money by selling it. And he was blessed to be able to get a new amp...just the one he wanted...as well as a few other musical items he'd been wanting. And...come to find out...there was a little extra left over...and because my husband is the sweetest ever, he wanted to share the extra with me and the boys!! He gave each of us a budget...to buy whatever we wanted.

The boys each chose to get brand new yummy baseball gloves. You should have seen them when they arrived in the mail. Almost as good as Christmas!

As for me? I didn't really KNOW what I wanted to spend my money on. I could think of lots of things that I wanted. But I felt like I needed to really spend the money wisely...make it count. I didn't want to just piddle it away. So I just waited.

And then it came to me...Monday morning. A camera. I want to buy a new camera. I know, I know...I have a camera. And a really nice camera. But I didn't have a small, easy to carry and travel with camera.

Mr. Adventure

A few weeks earlier I was able to check out my brother and sister in laws little camera...the Nikon s8000. And I was instantly impressed. Don't let the size fool ya! Ashton Kutcher is telling the truth... It has got some power for a little thing! Amazing zoom. Amazing clarity. And...it's small. And light. And perfect for a certain someones trip to Belgium!

Yes. That was it. I wanted a new camera.

So I called Chris and told him that I had decided what I wanted to spend my money on. And he was totally on board and said he'd get it ordered later that night! And he did...it should be here in a few days. I am so excited! This little gem is going to enable me to take amazing photos of my trip...and I'll hardly even know I'm carrying it! And it'll be great to take to baseball tournaments, too! (In case you didn't know...we attend a few of those now and then.) It's going to be a great travel camera. And I know I'm going to love it!

Don't get me wrong...I will always love my Canon. She is my beloved...another gift from my husband for my birthday a few years ago. He's such an encourager of my hobbies and interests...always has been. The Canon is perfect for stills...for the everyday shots I take for creative purposes. And even for family portrait type stuff. She will not be cast aside. And honestly...she's a bit of a homebody anyway...she's not big on travelling and she packs way too much when she does. Going somewhere with her is like going somewhere with a baby...too much stuff! So I think she's secretly glad that little Mr. Nikon came along...now she can stay home guilt-free while he goes out and does the adventurous stuff!

The art fair.

Hi! I'm sorry it's taken so long to report about the art fair. What a whirlwind BUSY weekend! As a matter of fact...all of last week is a blur! But...everything worked out in the end and everything got done. Well, except for a load of whites so everyone had to scrounge around for socks Monday morning. But other than that...

We reported for our booth space at a little before 8am on Saturday morning with our cars jam packed with stuff. We set up the canopy, two tables for display and a card table as a "register" area. We used canvas drop cloths to cover the sides of the canopy as well as the display tables. It gave the booth a nice neutral and casual backdrop. As we were setting up and hanging pictures and standing easels, we realized that we probably could have had our own booths! We were pretty cozy in that little space!

My friend Chris could have had his own booth for sure. He has a TON of inventory that he's amassed over the past few years. Me? Umm...I could have. But it would have been a little sparse. I don't have a lot of inventory, especially larger pieces, as I am just getting started in this endeavor. However, I met a nice gal first thing in the morning...a fellow photographer named Jessica (who does amazing Polaroid transfers, by the way, and I forgot to BUY one!)...and she had her booth set up cute and she didn't have a TON of inventory. When I went down to visit her she said, "See? You could have your own booth." And she was right. I could have. Next time?

So once the booth was set up, a little before 10am, we were ready for business. And let me tell you, the place was hoppin'! There was a steady flow of people all.day.long. It was a beautiful day...sunny and warm with cool breezes. Perfect. (Except for the wind that picked up around 3 or so and had everyone running after business cards and holding on to their canopies for dear life!) So many friends and family came by to support us...I saw people I hadn't seen in years...and met some new people. All in all it was a good experience. I'll do it again...definitely.

Once all was said and done I came away with $100 profit that went directly into the Belgium Fund envelope. This doesn't include my initial investment of frames and mats. But it does include my booth fee and packaging materials.

Thank you for all of your encouragement and interest. I wish more of you could have been there...but it would have been a bit of a drive...so I understand. *wink* And I know you were there with me in spirit...which was almost as good!

Anyway...all in all it was good. But I have to say I would NOT have been able to do it without the help of several people. My mom first of all. Oh my goodness...she helped me with every aspect of getting my things ready. Frame selection..mat selection...photo selection...framing...all of the stuff that overwhelms me when I try to do it on my own. So...thank you, Mom!! You RULE!!

A thank you to my Dad who let me run by at the very last minute to borrow the card table and chairs. I literally called him from my cell phone to ask if I could borrow them and when he said yes I said, "Thanks! I'll be there in 30 seconds!" And I was. He loaded them in my car and off I went. Thanks Dad!

And a thank you to Aunt Lisa who loaned me drop cloths and cool display pieces. She left a variety of things on her dining table for me to choose from...I went by while she was at work and borrowed what I needed. So thank you Aunt Lisa!! The addition of your cool stuff helped make the booth look interesting! (And by the way...Ollie is a VERY good watch dog...ahem. I like his pointy teeth and deep guttural growl. As Jenna would say...NBD.)

Also a thank you to Chris and Pat, my friends who joined me in this endeavor. They are husband and wife and helped me immensely. Pat was our secretary...setting up our booth fees and information...making the calls and dropping off the money. Thank you, Pat! And Chris saved my life at the last minute when my glassine envelopes hadn't arrived. He happened to have two packs of the exact sizes I needed and let me buy them from him. Whew!! That was close!

Seriously...I could not have done this on my own. Wait, I take that back...I could have. But I'd have been sitting on the ground, Indian style, holding down a half assembled canopy and selling my photos out of the envelopes they arrived in from the developer!

May Artisan Fair

Getting ready for the art fair this weekend...I'm selling photo note cards...photos in mats...and framed photos. Mom and I went to Aaron Bros. yesterday and spent almost three hours picking out mats and frames! Thank goodness she helped me...I'd have collapsed if I had to make all those choices on my own!

The fair is on Saturday from 10-5. I'm sharing a booth with a friend...he also does photography but our styles are completely different. He does amazing landscapes and wildlife photography. His photos are very masculine...so as Chris said, we'll have something for everyone!

I have a lot of work yet to do...framing, matting, more note card assembly...not to mention gathering props for our booth...crates, drop cloths, chunky baskets...I hope it looks like I imagine that it will! I'll take pictures...and let you know how it goes. All my proceeds are going toward my ticket to Belgium...so pray that our efforts are a success.

Off to start my day...up next...work!

Brainstorm with me, won't you?

I need your advice...

I am sharing a booth at an art festival with a friend in a few weeks. I am selling photos...in note card form and in photo form. Some 5x7's...possibly some 8x10's. Some with frames...some without. All proceeds are going toward my ticket to Belgium. (that I have to buy pretty soon and I'm not quite ready! I'm off to a good start...but I have a lot of funds yet to raise.)

So...

What I'd like to hear from you is...which of my photos do you think I should sell as frameable art at the art festival?

If you've got the time...would you be so kind as to leave me a comment and let me know what you think? If you want you can go to my flickr and poke around...or check out my note cards at Etsy...or go from memory if you have one. I don't...so I hesitate to include that. But if you do...good for you...and would you please let me know your secret?

Wait...what was I doing? Shoot...I hate when that happens. Oh! Yes...that's right. Help. Advice.

Anyway...if you have a favorite...or two...would you let me know which ones they are? It's hard for me to look at them from a buyer's point of view...plus I love to brain storm and you all are good at it!!

Thank you so much...I couldn't do this without you all...for real. Your encouragement and support have been invaluable to me. xo

photo challenge: color story

A Day with Mom: In Shades of White...

{diptych}

My mom and I were born on the same day.

That day is April 11.

{person...pushing my luck, I know}

We are exactly 20 years apart.

{up close}

It's a very cool thing to share a birthday with my mom.

It always has been...

{complimentary}

This year we decided to go to an amazing little shop in celebration...

{texture}

...do you have any idea where we went?

{blur}

Brainstorming.

I'm the type of person that loves to brainstorm. I always have been. I can sit and hash out ideas with someone else for hours until all of a sudden we have this huge thing...this huge idea...that we usually don't even know what to DO with! I have designed businesses...projects...restaurants. I've created so many things....all in my head!

And I will say, some of them have come to fruition. But many of them have not. And that's OK...that's what brainstorming is all about...the process. I love the process. It feeds my need for creativity...for something new...for a dream. And then when one of these crazy hair-brained ideas becomes something real? So amazing!!

Anyway...all of that being said, I need to brainstorm with you folks today. And since we're not able to meet at a groovy coffee house and sip lattes and scribble on napkins and hash out ideas...I'm going to make a Poll instead. (Wouldn't it totally be more fun the other way? Sometimes the world of blogging can be so lonely...)

So here's the skinny...I am considering developing my photographs into frameable 5x7's...possibly 8x10's...to sell in my Etsy shop. And I have some ideas...and some thoughts...but it's always better to talk it over with friends to see if I'm on a good track. This is where you come in! I need your creative...and honest...opinions. So if you would be so kind as to vote on my Poll I would greatly appreciate it.

And how about this...if you DO vote in the Poll, leave me a comment. Leaving me a comment will enter you into a drawing to receive something pretty in the mail. Probably something in the form of a...oh...I don't know...maybe a photograph?

So I guess I should go create the Poll, huh? Why do I always do things backwards? Wait...don't answer that. Just give me a minute and the Poll will be up.

It is definitely Monday!

Fresh stock in the shop today!

Friendly reminder...fresh photos in my shop today! Any orders placed today will be mailed out Monday...and will include a little bit extra in celebration of Easter!

{and don't forget to check out the photo assignment in the next post...it was a fun one!}

photo assignment: composition and perspective

Recently, some blogging friends, Camilla and Carolyn, started a fun blog, C&C Photography where they will post weekly photography challenges. This week's challenge was: composition and perspective. And I have to say...this was a fun one! I really enjoyed this challenge...and I really liked my subject...the old biscuit cutters I got at the yard sale last weekend for 50 cents!

So...here you go. Biscuit cutters...as I see them.

#1: As the eye sees it...

#2: bird's eye view...

#3: up close...

#4: off center...

#5: out of focus...

...and one extra...because I liked it...

And I just have to tell you this story...

Yesterday afternoon I looked out the window and realized the lighting would be great for this project. So I went into the kitchen to have myself a little photo challenge! As I was setting things up for the challenge...laying out the unbleached, muslin towel...laying out the old, rusty biscuit cutters...my husband watched with a puzzled look on his face. But after I took my first shot and looked at the screen on the back of my camera with him peering over my shoulder he said, "You definitely have an eye for this because I wasn't seeing it. Then I saw that picture and thought 'hey, those things are cool!'."

I'm thinking that was the best compliment ever.

Stocked the shop!

I just added some new sets of note cards to my Etsy Shop today...

FRESH PICKED

and...

GO GREEN

Stop by The Shop and take a look around! xo

**edit** As I was putting together this post, both sets of GO GREEN sold! However, I can still accept orders as "Back Order" if you'd like...just convo me on Etsy and let me know!

Before I know it...

...it will be time to board a plane, fly over the ocean for a day (chomping my finger nails at the very thought, thankyouverymuch), and spend 10 days in Belgium.

Because so many of you are supporting me...both in prayer and through financial support...I have decided to include you in this process of preparing for my ministry trip.

While in Belgium I will be speaking...possibly just to women, but maybe not...about depression. I will be sharing biblical tools that the Lord has given me over the years to combat those dark times. I will be sharing that God is my anti-depressant...and He can be theirs, too.

Another project that God put on my heart for this trip is to create a small devotional...I envision it small enough to toss in your purse. It will be full of encouragement and scripture. It will also include some of my photos. This idea is still a bit foggy...but God has already given me notes...and possible "chapter" titles. I have created a Publisher document so that when the inspiration strikes it is ready to go. All I have to do is open it and type.

I'm really excited about this project, I have to admit. I am a creative person through and through. There is a part of me that needs to make things...whether it's food or a garden or a clothespin doll or a collage or a photo...doing these things fulfills a need in me that goes way back to when I was a little girl. I have been creative from the start...beginning with coloring pictures and sitting and drawing with my Papa. He's the master of profiles. I never could quite get it. I was more of a house and a flower and a tree kinda girl.

I remember in 2nd grade I would always be the first to finish my times tables so that I could be the first to choose my free time activity...ART.

And in 3rd grade I decided I wanted to write a book. And I did. Mrs. Addison helped me. I got an A. Or was it extra-credit? Either way...it was awful. And my mom still has it. I was so proud of that dang book. Guess what the title was? I have no idea what I was thinking. It was titled, "Kathy". What?! That's the best I could come up with? Anyway...it was fun nonetheless. I wrote it and did the illustrations. It was about, yes, you guessed it, Kathy. And her mom got pregnant. And someone wanted a boy and someone wanted a girl...so guess what?!! It turns out her mom was pregnant with TWINS...a boy AND a girl. Imagine that?!

Oh my...what can I say? I was 8.

Anyway...isn't it interesting to look back on your life to see the things that God placed in you from the start? And then to see how those interests and desires come full circle to become something that God had planned for you. It's amazing. And so is God.

I humbly ask you to continue to pray for me...for inspiration, for clarity, for peace, for TIME and that I'm able to get it all done. I still have to send out my donation letter to friends and family. I'm late in doing that...again, the whole "asking for money" thing is tough for me. But...I need to raise the money, SOON...and I need help in doing it...so I will work on that this weekend. I also need to get my passport going. Costco takes pictures for $5 each...and I need to make a Costco run anyway...so I plan on doing that next week. Butter, tortillas and a passport. Interesting.

I'm also adding some more note cards to my Etsy shop in a little while...take a look if you'd like. All proceeds go toward The Belgium Project.

Is there anything else you'd like to be kept up on that I've forgotten to mention? Or do you have any questions about the ministry...the devotional...me...whatever? Just leave a comment or send me an email...if I have the answer I'll be happy to share with you!

Off to a great start!

I want to send out a HUGE Thank You to those of you who have purchased my photo note cards in support of my trip to Belgium. Some of you purchased for yourself. And others have had giveaways on their blogs. And it is so wonderful and it warms my heart...

I am blown away by your support and generosity. Thank you SO MUCH.

I also want to extend another HUGE Thank You to those of you who have made donations to The Belgium Fund. I have to say, adding that Donate button wasn't easy for me. But I did it. And you responded. BIG TIME. Thank you, thank you, thank you. I can't say it enough...

Stay tuned for some new designs being added to the shop. There's more to come!

New Beginnings: A Ministry.

I told you a few weeks back about a ministry I was chosen to be a part of, New Beginnings. In case you're new here, visit this post to read more about it and my involvement in it. We will be going to Brussels, Belgium from September 9-20 of this year. It truly is a God thing...and even though I am terrified, (again, read the original post to see why I'm a scaredy-cat...ahem) I am also getting really excited about it. We just had a meeting this morning and there were so many amazing confirmations that if I had any doubts about this whole thing before the meeting...they were certainly gone after the meeting.

OK, so down to the details. In less than two months I am going to need to purchase my ticket to Belgium. And in order to do this, I need to do some major fund-raising. I have to be honest, this is not something I am comfortable with...at all. I'm not real great at asking for help (just ask my family...right family?)...and I'm even worse at asking for money. But I know that this is something that God has called me to do...so I will do whatever is necessary to be obedient. And...one of those things is asking for your help in raising those funds.

After prayerful consideration, I have landed on three ways that you can help me over the next 6 months:

1. Prayer. HUGELY important. Oh, how I need your prayers. Pray that I am obedient and in God's will. Pray that my words are encouraging and edifying. Pray that I will be bold and brave...that I will not have a spirit of fear. Pray that I have a peaceful heart while I'm away from my family for such a long time. And pray for my husband as he willingly and lovingly holds down the fort while I'm away. Pray that the "project" God has put on my heart to take with me to Belgium is a success (more on that at a later date!...it's going to be pretty cool!). Pray for the people in Belgium that we will be ministering to and whatever else God puts on your heart for the New Beginnings Ministry.
2. Shop my Etsy shop. Over the next 6 months I will be selling my photos in my Etsy Shop in the form of note card sets, as well as some other original pieces of art, to raise funds for The Belgium Project. All earnings will go toward travel expenses...my airfare, my room and board, food...etc.
3. Donate. Maybe you don't want any note cards. Maybe you just want to give a donation. If that is the case, you will find a Donate button on the top left-hand side of my blog. When you click that button it will take you to Paypal where you can make a donation of any amount. Any amount...large or small...is so very much appreciated. And please, if you Donate, be sure to leave your name and address so that I can send you an update when we return from our mission! I'm sure I'll have lots to tell!

So. There it is. It's official. Your support is so greatly appreciated. This whole thing is so surreal...and so humbling...and I'm grateful that you are joining me on this incredible journey.

On that note...I'm off to stock the shop! Hope to see you there!

I feel like giving something away!!

**GIVEAWAY IS CLOSED! WINNER WILL BE ANNOUNCED MONDAY!**

Yep...you read that right. I feel like I want to GIVE SOMETHING AWAY TODAY!!

And that something is this....

The "One Year Devotional for People of Purpose, 365 meditations on how to make an impact on your world".

And let me just say, we are ALL people of purpose. Every last one of us. And we all have the ability to make an impact in the world. None of us is too small...or too insignificant. God has a plan for our lives...for my life, for your life and for your life and for yours and yours and yours. So don't think that this devotional is not for you...because it IS. Most definitely.

Along with the devotional, in celebration of my Etsy shop re-opening happening REAL SOON, I am also going to include a set of my new photo note cards.

I am so excited!

And I hope you like them...xo

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

So...to enter this GIVEAWAY all you have to do is tell me one thing about yourself...anything you want...anything. Whatever. Just tell me the first thing that comes to mind...I'm all ears!

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

The GIVEAWAY will close Sunday evening at 8pm.

The winner will be selected randomly by drawing...and will be announced on Monday when I officially RE-STOCK my Etsy shop.

So what are you waiting for? Go on...go to the Comments section and tell me something about YOU. Anything at all... xoxo

Day 1.

It's Monday. February 1st. Already. And it's the first day of my Daniel Fast.

I always prepare our coffee the night before. Last night, I only put together enough for Chris. This morning, I am drinking water instead. And it's good...and ice cold. And I'm thankful for ice water...and water in general. I take it for granted.

So, some of you have expressed an interest in hearing about the fast as I go along. I created a Poll in the side column for you to vote on how much I talk about it. Do you want to know what I eat? How I prepare it? Scriptures that come to mind? Do you want to know it all? Or just a little. Go take the Poll...let me know what you think!

I took the picture last week when I visited the little church that Chris and I got married in. It's in the middle of an old, beautiful cemetery. Some of the headstones date back to the late 1700's. It's amazing. I love it there. It's not too far from me...maybe a 10 minute drive. Not bad. The picture is of the inside of the church, as seen through the window. So it's also got the reflection of the landscape. Kinda fun.

New Beginnings: The Belgium Project.

Sorry to keep you in suspense! So here it is...the news: in October I was invited to be a part of a new ministry at my church, New Beginnings. My good friend, Irvina, who is an amazing singer, was asked by a pastor friend of hers to bring her ministry team to Belgium, to his church, to sing and speak and minister to them.

She and I happened to be talking on Facebook at the same time she was talking to him. She was so excited about it and said, "Hey! Maybe you could come, too!" "And do what?" I asked. (Because like I've mentioned before, I don't sing.) She said, "Girl, you need to speak." And I immediately replied, "Uh. NO. I don't think so. But you have a great time!"

Well, the more we talked about it, the more ideas that flowed. And I was more than willing to be a part of the behind-the-scenes stuff. I offered to help in whatever way I could. Here at home. But go? To Belgium? No.

And I'll tell you why I said no. I don't want to do something "in the name of God" unless GOD has asked me to DO it. I don't do things because my pastor asks...or because a friend asks...or because it could be a good opportunity...or a chance to see another country. If I do something...in the name of the Lord..it will be because HE has asked me to do it. It will be because HE has dropped it in my spirit and given me the desire of my heart to do whatever it is that needs doing. And honestly, while we were chatting online, I wasn't sure that it was a God thing...for me. I thought it was a God thing for her. I definitely thought it would be an amazing opportunity! Absolutely. But...maybe not for me. So I left it at that.

Or so I thought.

Over the next couple of days I couldn't think of anything else. So I just kept it in my heart and prayed about it...asking God for confirmation if I was, in fact, supposed to be a part of New Beginnings or not. And once the flood gates opened...the confirmations just kept pouring in.

Jeremiah 29:11...for I know the plans I have for you. Plans He had whispered to me over the course of this past year. Plans I didn't vocalize. Plans I shoved back into the box. Plans I didn't want to admit were being made. Plans for me to speak. In front of people. Uh, there's a reason that I BLOG. Because it's not in front of people. Are you hearing me? I am terrified to speak in front of people. It makes my stomach hurt. And it makes my hands shake...it makes my whole body shake...including my voice. Public speaking is not my thing. I got a C- in my speech class for crying out loud! Me? Speak? You must have the wrong girl, Lord.

But God continued...bringing to mind old journal entries where He'd told me I'd be speaking. Reminders of long ago prayers asking to use my creativity for His glory. Then a friend reminded me of some words she spoke to me at this past women's retreat in October..."God wants you to know this has all been preparation...next year at this time you'll be doing something you never thought you'd do."

More and more scriptures began coming to the forefront of my mind...Isaiah 43...when you walk through the fires you will not be burned. Isaiah 61...He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim freedom for the captives and release from darkness for the prisoners.

The more I thought about it...and the more I prayed...the more I knew that I was supposed to be a part of this ministry....regardless of my fears and insecurities. The bottom line is...it's not about me. It's about others. It's about them. It's about you. It's about the homeless kid atthe grocery store. It's about setting myself aside and allowing God to use me and my experiences to proclaim freedom for captives. To release prisoners from darkness.

Once I got a grip on the fact that I was called to be a part of New Beginnings I began to pray about what God wanted me to share. What did He want me to speak about? The answer came clear as a bell when Irvina called me and said, "God revealed to me what you are to speak on. Depression." I knew she was right. I immediately began to cry.

Of course I would be asked to talk about depression. Why didn't I see that right from the start? Depression is something I've been dealing with for years. I can't pinpoint when it started. But I can pinpoint when it got it's worst. Let's just say it's been a battle for over 20 years. And...I'm still in it. The only difference now is that I have God to help me through it...I have biblical truths and weapons to help me fight the good fight.

Over the years I've come to the conclusion that depression is my "thorn". It's the thing in my life that keeps me grounded...that keeps me tethered to God...that keeps my face turned toward His day after day after day. If it weren't for Him, I don't know where I'd be. He has saved me...and kept me...and showed me how to be victorious. As I like to say, "God is my anti-depressant."

So...there you have it. On one hand...no big deal. On the other hand? A HUGE deal. I am amazed and terrified that God has chosen me to do this...to share my story in hopes of helping others find freedom in God's amazing grace.

I have about 6 months to prepare. 6 months to make sure I've got my message straight...and 6 months to raise the funds to get my behind on a plane to Brussels, Belgium!

This brings up my next point....fund raising. I need to earn money for my flight to Europe. So over the next couple of months, among other fund raising ideas, I will be advertising items in my Etsy shop for sale...mainly notecards made with some of my own photos. And all proceeds will go to the ministry to help pay my way.

I pray that you will help me in my endeavors...that you will tell others of my goal and spread the word about my Etsy shop in hopes that many will support my goal and this ministry.

I also ask that you pray for me. Pray that I am courageous...and bold...and transparent...and clear and concise. Pray that I am organized. And efficient. Pray that I am protected...a lot of times when we do something for God, the enemy doesn't like it. At all. And he will do anything he can to distract me...to weaken my effectiveness...to stop me. So pray for protection...of my mind and my thoughts.

My mom sent me an email a while back that said something like..."Be the kind of woman that when your feet hit the floor each morning the devil says "Oh cr**...she's up!"

That's right. I don't want to worry about him. I want HIM to worry about ME.

Thank you in advance...for your prayers and for your support. I am grateful...