Tuesday, June 7, 2011

and all of a sudden...just like that...

...another school year has slipped by. And my boys are another year older. And both about a foot taller! Seth looks over my head and Ian is now looking me eye to eye.

Today is the last day of school. And as always...it's bittersweet. Bitter...because I miss my little boys. I miss Lego's and forts and color books and Arthur and running through the sprinklers. I miss bath time and washing their hair and wrapping them up in big fluffy towels. I miss feety pajamas and bunk beds and bedtime stories. I miss my little boys.

But then there's the sweet...watching them turn into young men. Watching them learn about the world...and learn to make choices and decisions. Talking about driving permits (I know!!) and parties and friends. Watching them take off in cars with those friends...or head downtown on a scooter with a buddy....and tossing out a quick prayer, knowing God's got them in the palm of His hand.

Parenting is hard. No doubt about it. But it's also so incredibly good, and sweet...such a blessing...to be entrusted with the lives of two men...which is what I try to see them as. Because that is what I want to raise them to be. Men. Not boys. I don't always hit the target...sometimes I can't help but see "my baby". 

We all do it...my mom does it (still...love you mom!)...her mom did it...it's a mom thing. We can't help it. It's like as soon as we find out we're pregnant...things change. And suddenly we begin to think like a mom. It's no longer all about me. It's about someone else. We become protective...and begin to see the world for the crazy, dangerous place that it is.

These sweet little lives grow right next to our hearts...and become our hearts. When they are born...and leave our bodies...they take a piece of our hearts with them. It's in them...like they were in us. And just like that...we are connected...always. (No matter how far they may go....)


nancy said...

i've thought everything you just said at some point this year about my girls. you're right when you say it is bittersweet.

Mavis said...

I agree... it's bittersweet.

P.S. I miss Arthur too :)

Denise said...

arthur was my favorite. i would sit and watch with them.

i can relate to your every word.

Beegirl said...

You've given the world the gift of two fine young men. Congratulations on your growing boys.. Wishing them-and you-an amazing summer together!